


Monica died

by PrettyCalypso



Category: Shameless (US)
Genre: Brief mention of the Gallagher clan, Canon Compliant, M/M, Mention of Terry Milkovich, Mentions of Monica's death, Mentions of Trevor, Phone Calls & Telephones, Post 7x12
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-10
Updated: 2017-03-10
Packaged: 2018-10-02 04:58:19
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 597
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10210094
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrettyCalypso/pseuds/PrettyCalypso
Summary: Monica died, and there's only one person Ian can (and want to) talk to.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I was thinking about 7x12 and if there's still something I can't get over with in this episode is that we barely had any scene with Ian and with his reaction to Monica's death. They spent so much time in the show establishing that the two characters looked a lot alike, and when she dies we don't know how Ian feels. Yes, Frank and Fiona's reactions were important because Monica was the love of Frank's life, and because Fiona took her place as a mother. But there was Lip's reaction (he needed to see his sponsor because he wanted to drink) and Debbie's reaction (she still believes Monica was a good mother in her own way who loved them and never stopped thinking about them). But Ian??? Who the fuck knows how he feels?????  
> So I wrote this...

 

“ _I guess the motherfucker really did love the crazy bitch.”_

 

“ _You didn't know that?”_

 

“ _I never really wanted to believe it.”_

 

 

Ian was lying in bed, in his empty room, away from his brothers, staring at the dark ceiling. Things had been hectic since he came back, and he didn't really have any time to process anything. Now that the funeral was over though, and that the Gallagher party had died down, the silence was overwhelming. Monica was dead. The slut, crazy bitch, drunk, junkie, his mother, mom, mommy. Hurricane Monica would no longer barge in to disrupt their life, but their – sometimes – sweet and caring mother would never come back either.

 

Ian sighed, a long, painful, sigh, keeping the tears at bay. He grabbed his phone from the bedside table and searched through it for the number of the prepaid phone. It rang. Five, six times. No answer. Ian sighed again and dropped the phone on his chest.

 

Trevor had wanted to come to the funeral. It was nice. Trevor was a nice guy, a knight in shining armor always ready to help and to do good things around him. Maybe that was what he wanted to do with Monica, help her, without knowing her. Or maybe he genuinely liked her, for only the couple of hours he spent with her. Trevor was nice, and Ian was always happy to talk to him, but here he didn't get it, he didn't get Monica, and he didn't get where Ian was coming from in his relationship with her.

 

The phone buzzed on his stomach, and Ian picked it up, glancing quickly at the 'Private Number' flashing across the screen, before taking the call.

 

“Hello?”

 

“What the fuck are you calling me for?”

 

Ian emitted a little laugh at the rudeness of the greeting, before he remembered why he was calling and his smile dropped.

 

“Monica died.”

 

There was a small silence on the other end of the line.

 

“Shit.” Mickey finally muttered. “You okay?”

 

“I don't know.” Ian admitted. “I've wanted her dead so many times growing up, but she was still my mom you know...”

 

“Yeah.” Mickey said softly, and Ian could almost hear him nod.

 

Mickey understood, and Ian knew that if Terry died Mickey would feel the same struggle – even though Terry was a hundred times more abusive than Monica, he was still his dad.

 

“She was never there for the important things.” Ian added. “But I went... _crazy_ , I felt like she was the only one who could understand me. She was the only one who wasn't trying to change me, to stuff meds down my throat.”

 

Mickey stayed silent at that, and Ian smiled even though he knew the other man couldn't see it.

 

“Wasn't such a good thing after all.” he joked, and he heard a small snicker from Mickey's side.

 

They didn't say anything after that. They both breathed slowly in the silence, listening to the other being alive and well so far away. Ian closed his eyes and inhaled deeply. At that very moment he missed Mickey's smell more than anything else. His calming, grounding smell.

 

“I'm sorry.” Mickey said slowly after a while, and Ian knew he was probably talking about Monica.

 

“Me too.” he answered, just above a whisper. “I love you Mick.”

 

“Yeah.” Mickey sneered, like he almost didn't believe the words.

 

Ian waited for him to hang up, or to tell him to go fuck himself, but it didn't came, and Mickey's voice when he spoke again was small and broken.

 

“Love you too Gallagher.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Please leave kudos and/or comments. And you can also come talk and share with me on my [tumblr](http://ilostmylifeonline.tumblr.com/), it's always appreciated. :)


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